I’m guessing even “Mid-Sneeze Elvis” would have gotten votes.


This is a post for all the writers out there. If you’re not a writer, if you just enjoy watching me suffer on here, then this isn’t for you. Also, if you are one of the wedge-people, this isn’t for you either. I define the wedge-people as those who seem to think that the stories come out of anything other than me. Wedge-people tell me that I think too much about strange things. That I shouldn’t worry so much about what color jacket one of my characters is wearing, or that I’m just trying to get attention when I walk away from the group and start talking to myself because I’ve got a bit of dialogue that’s just on the verge of solidifying and I know if I don’t get it right then and text it to myself I’ll never quite get it perfectly. I call them wedge people because they seem to think it makes sense to jam a wedge in between me as they see me and the stories as they read them. Basically I get the idea sometimes that they think the stories are beamed into my head by aliens. All the odd little things I do to make sure I capture a thought right, those can’t be how I go about writing a story. Surely I just sit down at the keyboard and 5,000 words plop out while I sit perfectly still. Then I detach and never think about writing again until it’s time to sit down and plop out another 5,000 words. In their mind there’s a wedge between the two processes. Between the life and the work. Between the writer and the writing.

Okay. That sort of snuck up on me. Apparently I have some weird reservoir of anger concerning wedge-people. Interesting.

But here’s my point. For you writers. I have a deadline in one week and I have nothing. And what I’m doing is sitting here researching the Elvis stamp vote. And I have absolutely no idea why. But this is what I’m doing. So I’m going to do it. You follow? Don’t try and mold yourself to fit anyone else’s idea of what an author is, and don’t try to schedule your time to fit anyone else’s idea of what an author should do. You’ve got to be able to wander into the weird stuff on your own terms and on your own time. And never let someone who doesn’t write convince you that the stuff that takes place at the keyboard is the only important part. Granted, the typing part of things is pretty high up there on the list. I’ll be swapping over to my ever-open Word document at some point tonight to type something…anything.

So, yes, the actual typing is important. The only thing more important than the typing? Well that would be what you do with every other second of your life.

And who the hell voted for Old Elvis?