I was walking home today and I started noticing the cars parked and driving all around me. There were white cars and gray cars and beige cars and tan cars and black cars and I started to realize that cars nowadays come in the broadest array of boring-ass colors ever. Granted, I was only able to take a small sampling, but I did keep my eyes open all during my walk to the PATH and all during my walk up Central Park West and I saw barely any cars with some verve to them. Maybe one or two red cars, and even those were a sort of muted maroon red, so I’m not sure they count. The most colorful thing out there were the taxi cabs, but, again, they’re a kind of matte yellow now.

What’s the deal? Where are the cars that pop? It wasn’t always like this.

America, where hath your whimsy gone?